Vessel

Okay, I am done with this latest readthrough of The Flower of Knighthood. I only need to type the last batch of changes into the manuscript and then I am ready to… read it again! It’s fascinating to me what the process of working on it so hard has done for me. It’s developed my nervous system to a higher degree, as art always does in an alchemical process – as one does the work in the outside world, the work is also done in the inner space, since we can perceive everything only inside of ourselves. The work of each pass through it has not only untangled strands in the language of the manuscript, it has also done the same for my own mind. Our nerves are bundles of fibers, and all of the readthroughs have felt like a comb-out of my synapses and a massage of my grey matter, like a spa treatment from the inside out. I realized something else profound about the text last night as I was finishing it. Even after I “fix” this book in its final form, as the Copyright Office terms it, and call it done, it will continue to be a living, breathing thing. All of the life and energy that I put into it will remain forever, and it will continue to be informed by my essence. It will also become a container for all of the experiences that others have while reading it, and I could not be happier about that. It’s why I want to share my work, to both express myself and to interact with others. That’s the reason I labored over it to weave it so closely, like a well-made basket – watertight, but not airtight, because it will always want to breathe. It will need to be able to hold a lot, and to hold up well over time. It’s like a Moses basket that I am putting something precious into, and sending out onto the river to let the current carry where it needs to go.